Doc Hollywood v. Dr. Real World

Who would you choose?

Dr. Hibbert/Dr. Nick comparison

A tongue-in-cheek analysis in the Canadian Medical Association Journal compares the services of Dr. Hibbert and Dr. Nick Riviera, a quack physician often used by The Simpsons as an alternative source of medical advice. While Hibbert is praised for his sense of humor and quality of care, it concludes that Riviera is a better role model for physicians; Hibbert is a paternalistic and wasteful physician, unlike Riviera, who strives to cut costs and does his best to avoid the coroner.

Dr. Hibbert is a parody of Bill Cosby's character Dr. Cliff Huxtable. But lately, on the web, I've seen another comparison being made. I'm not sure if I agree with it.

Conrad Murray has been sentenced to max - 4 years

The Murray defense team asked the judge to read Murrays autobiography. They asked him to "Read the whole book"

But this is Qanday, and we will do more than that. We go back farther, and see it all.

Max Jacobson - "Dr. Feelgood"

Marlene Dietrich

Anthony Quinn

Tennessee Williams

Truman Capote

Maya Deren

Eddie Fisher

Mickey Mantle

Cecil B. DeMille

Alan Jay Lerner

Yul Brynner

Nelson Rockefeller

Zero Mostel

President John F. Kennedy

"Miracle Tissue Regenerator" which consisted of amphetamines, vitamins, painkillers, and human placenta.

"I don’t care if it’s horse piss. It works."-JFK

Jacobson botched the injection he gave Mickey Mantle, putting Mickey in the hospital and ruining his chances of breaking the Babe Ruth single-season homerun record. It became infected, and doctors had to lance the area with a three-inch star-shaped incision over the hip to permit the area to drain. "The hole was big enough to fit a golf ball."

On the far left, President Kennedy. On the far right, Dr. Max Jacobson

Presidential photographer Mark Shaw, died at the age of 47. An autopsy showed that Shaw had died of "acute and chronic intravenous amphetamine poisoning." Under questioning, office workers admitted to buying large quantities of amphetamines to give many high level doses. The Bureau of Narcotics and Dangerous Drugs seized Jacobsons supply and his medical license was revoked in 1975 by the New York State Board of Regents.

George C. Nichopoulos - "Dr. Nick"

Jerry Lee Lewis

Elvis Presley

In 1980, he was indicted on 14 counts of overprescribing drugs to Elvis Presley and Jerry Lee Lewis, as well as twelve other patients. The district-attorney ruled out murder charges because of the conflicting medical opinions about the cause of Presleys death. In 1977 alone, Nichopoulos had prescribed over 10,000 doses of amphetamines, barbiturates, narcotics, tranquilizers, sleeping pills, laxatives, and hormones for Presley. Dr. Nichopoulos claimed he had tried in vain to reduce Elvis dependency, even going so far as to manufacture one thousand placebos for Elvis, but to no avail. The jury concluded that he had tried to act in the best interests of his patients. He was acquitted on all counts. Also in 1980, the Tennessee Board of Medical Examiners found him guilty of overprescription, but decided that he was not unethical. They imposed a three month suspension of his licence and three years of probation.

In 1995 Nichopoulos had his license permanently revoked by the Tennessee Board of Medical Examiners, after it was revealed that he had been overprescribing to numerous patients for years.

Doctor Shoppers

Anna Nicole Smith

Corey Haim

River Phoenix

Rush Limbaugh

Before his addiction became publicly known, Rush Limbaugh often argued that drug users should be put in jail rather than treated. "Drug use, some might say, is destroying this country. And we have laws against selling drugs, pushing drugs, using drugs, importing drugs. ... And so if people are violating the law by doing drugs, they ought to be accused and they ought to be convicted and they ought to be sent up."

Dr. Phil Astin
• Chris Beniot

The Chris Benoit double murder suicide occurred over a three-day period ending on June 24, 2007. Both, his wife and son died of asphyxiation. From the description of their wounds, many fans have speculated that Beniot killed them with a variation of his WWE finishing move, The Crippler Crossface.

Shortly after the death of the Benoit family, federal officials raided the offices of Dr. Astin. They discovered many instances of him prescribing pills for people without having conducted physical exams and vastly over prescribing dangerous drugs like Percocet, Vicodin, and Oxycontin. Other investigations, uncovered that 12 other wrestlers, many of whom lived on the other side of the country, regularly traveled to Atlanta just to see Dr. Astin. He pleaded guilty to a 175-count indictment and was sentenced to 10 years in prison.

Is it fair to compare Dr Hibbert on the Simpsons to Conrad Murray? Probably not. But also, Cliff Huxtable is unfair and unrealistic standard to hold. Frustrated Cosby Show writers dreamed of writing more real-world charcters, and created the "Roseanne" tv series.

Now that we have read "the whole book," we can agree when Judge Michael Pastor called it "a cycle of horrible medicine."

Welcome to the real world